Emily Long Strong
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A pursuit of strength.

"Everytime you 'save' yourself from experiencing the pain of growth,
you prevent yourself from experiencing the FULLNESS of life."


The Process.

7/31/2014

5 Comments

 
It has been over 10 years that my husband, Jason has been involved in the fitness industry, and now just over 6 for me. There are several things that we have learned during that time of working closely with people from all different walks of life, different ages, different goals, and different levels of motivation.

But what’s crazy is that, like with most things, all of those people with all of their differences still only fall into 2 categories: 1) Those who achieve their goals and, 2) Those who do not.

So no matter if it’s an athlete or a fitness client, someone who has 100 pounds to lose or 10, or someone who is 20 or 55, the process is almost always identical.

Here’s what I mean… everyone wants to get from Point A (where you are) to Point B (where you want to be). Everyone can say out loud what they want to achieve or tell themselves where they’re going to be 6 months from now.

So what’s the difference between the two groups?

The Process.

I’m going to start by challenging you to think outside of the box for a minute.

Think of the last time you accomplished something, small or big. (Examples: Graduated from college, passed a big test, got a great job, got a promotion, lost weight, took a leap of faith, etc…)

If I came up to you after your big job promotion and said “Wow! What a stroke of luck! You are SO lucky to have gotten that job promotion. The stars must have totally aligned for you! How excited you must be to have been chosen by luck out of all of those people!”

What would your response to me be? Probably a smack in the face. And it would be well-deserved.

Because what I just did there is rob from you the PROCESS, and assume that you did not work hard and bust your butt for that promotion, but that you just got your wish granted. You lucky duck!

What about if you just lost 50 pounds. And I say to you “Man, you are so lucky. You have a gift of will-power that I just don’t have. You are so lucky that you lost that weight.”

Again, what would your response to me be? SLAP! You’d say, do you know what I had to SACRIFICE to lose 50 pounds?? Do you know how many times I had to say no to cake, cookies and donuts?! Do you know how many times I almost cried in my office because everyone at work was trying to pressure me to give in on “pizza day”? Do you know how hurtful it was when my friends and family told me I could never do it because I had tried and failed SO many times before? But guess what I DID IT. Because I CHOSE to do it. Every day I made choices that led me to where I am. And as a result I have gained confidence, improved my quality of life, realized how strong I am and can be, and finally started to believe that I can do ANYTHING I set my mind to. 

And you’d be right.

When people would approach me about 6 months after giving birth and would say to me,  “You are SO lucky that you snapped right back and got into shape after having a baby. I knew you would! I wish I had your genetics. You are SO lucky!!”

Do you know what my response was? “You are right! I am SO lucky that I got up every morning and prepared my food for the day. I’m so lucky that I worked out at least 4 times a week INTENSELY and fueled my body properly. I am so lucky that even when I didn’t feel like it, or didn’t “have time”, I got moving because my goal was too big to let laziness, procrastination, and excuses get in my way. I am so lucky that I made a CHOICE to do whatever it took to get my body back to better shape than it was before I had the baby. I’m such a lucky duck.”

Here’s the deal, you guys. I
t has never… I repeat… NEVER been about the “end result”. It has NEVER been about the goal. It has ALWAYS been about the process. The major difference between those who fail and those who succeed is that the ones who fail are ONLY focused on the end result and are ignoring the process, where those who succeed are focused on what they need to do TODAY. They are focused on the process and understand that it would be insane to think they could get to their goal any other way.

If today I promised you that you could take a magic pill and end up exactly where you want to be, many of you may take it. But at the end of the day,
what builds you as a person, develops your character, makes you stronger and more willing to take on challenges, improves your confidence and quality of life, is not suddenly achieving the end result. The thing that does all of those things is the process you had to go through to get there.

Ask any successful person what their favorite part of their journey to achieving their goals was and they will tell you… The Process.

At the end of the day,
if we did not have to go through difficulties, we could never grow. I for one can say that as a young married couple, it was the years of being completely broke, in debt, working 4 jobs, trying to build something from nothing, and realizing that God was going to teach us the SAME lessons over and over again until we finally learned them, that taught us skills and lessons that have made us a million times stronger and more resilient today. I have learned that so many times that I actually look forward to periods of discomfort now because they ALWAYS lead to incredible growth IF I choose to be humble and accept it.

You’ve all heard this quote by Michael Jordan: “I have missed over 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”

…think about that.

The book “Think and Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill talks about how
“each and every failure brings with it a seed of equivalent success”. Of course a seed by itself can do nothing. It must be planted, nurtured and taken care of until it is ready to grow into that success.

So I’ll leave you with this thought.
Are you enjoying the journey? Or are you being deceived by the lie that you are failing because you have not yet succeeded?

Because what you need to remember is that
this very process that you’re in right now IS the achievement of the goal. Be thankful that you’re in a “process” right now at all! Because if you weren’t that would mean you are stale, stagnant, bored and without purpose or direction. It would mean you are moving backwards, because no one can ever just “stay the same”.  Take The Process a million times more seriously than the end result. By the time you get there, you’ll have 5 more goals lined up anyway, and 5 more processes to enjoy.

Squeeze every bit of personal growth and development out of The Process. Learn every lesson there is to learn. Be patient with yourself.
Do not allow yourself alibi’s for why you’re not doing what you need to be doing to get where you want to go. Allow yourself to fail but remember that when you do you have a seed you need to plant and nurture EVERY single day until it has grown into an equivalent success. Be prepared to hold up the mirror and confront yourself to find out what went really well that day and what needs to improve. Be Strong!

Now that you understand why you should be rejoicing in your process, it's time to get plugged in. I wanted to create a way to keep people accountable and encouraged. Unfortunately it's not always those people closest to us that are our biggest encouragers. It may be because they're afraid we'll get hurt by failing, or it may be because they don't understand why you want to change when everything in their life is staying the same. Regardless, you need to surround yourself with people that are on the same journey as you. That is why I  came up with the idea for #TheProcessProject.

Your time to start is NOW. Not tomorrow, not on Monday. If you are DEAD SERIOUS about becoming who you want to become on your way to achieving what you want to achieve, then you need to suck it up buttercup and get started right this second. Here's how! Click on #TheProcessProject and learn how you can get involved RIGHT NOW!!!!!
5 Comments
Darlene
8/3/2014 11:19:59 pm

Wonderfully written. Looks like someone else has a passion for teaching! Can't wait to hear all the accomplishments and success stories of our journeys...so proud of you for taking on this new challenge and responsibility

Reply
Ute
8/4/2014 06:51:37 pm

Yes and amen! This message is VITAL!
I can totally vouch for your theory having experienced it myself.
In one area of my life I worked towards a goal and didn't care for the process AT ALL (my studies) "I just want to graduate!", in another area of my life (my health) I saw the value in every day I committed to the principles of a process towards a healthy, strong me. I cannot tell you how miserable I felt as a student for 3 long years, and how empowered I felt as a fitness nerd! I'd go to the gym after doing my studies of the day and feel like I was finally being productive! (Never mind all the very useful and essential things I'd acquired)
In fact, in my case I have no doubt that it's because I've fallen in LOVE with the PROCESS that I, time and again, surprise myself with positive results! I reconfigure my goals long before I've reached them, because working towards something motivate me, and keeps me focused and disciplined.

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Alane
8/5/2014 09:48:05 am

I had a Salada tea bag tag taped to my fridge for years that said "Life is about the journey, not the destination." At that time, life had not yet thrown me many hard trials and I guess I interpreted that quote to kind of mean "enjoy the ride." I realize now, after walking through several difficult life events in the past few years, that the journey is not about enjoying the ride as much as it is about making the most of all of it…the mountains and the valleys, the smooth roads and the pot holes…and learning and growing through each experience. #TheProcessProject has inspired me anew to set new goals and to take positive steps every day to achieve those goals. So very proud of the leadership role you've taken to impact other's lives for the better. You are a world-changer and one of my heroes. Thank you!

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lindsay
8/13/2014 03:29:24 am

very thoughtful message here. I 100% agree with everything and would just highlight that it is up to YOU to decide what your goals are and not to get caught up in what your friends/family are doing. It's up to you to decide how you define what being "successful" is at the end of the day. ;)

Reply
Kristan
8/29/2014 10:41:30 am

Great thoughts! Enjoyed meeting you and working out with you at Kingdom Bound!

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    EmilyLongStrong.com is all about the honesty,  vulnerability, transparency, struggle and process of becoming as mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually strong as I possibly can. Every idea I share is something I've learned (probably the hard way). Thanks for joining me on this journey!  

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